The Confederate States of The Old South is a gargantuan, safe nation, ruled by President Wade Hampton V with an even hand, and remarkable for its barren, inhospitable landscape, zero percent divorce rate, and complete absence of social welfare. The hard-nosed, hard-working population of 16.993 billion Southerners have some civil rights, but not too many, enjoy the freedom to spend their money however they like, to a point, and take part in free and open elections, although not too often.

The relatively small government prioritizes Defense, although Education, Industry, and Law & Order are also considered important, while Social Policy and Environment aren't funded at all. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Montgomery. The average income tax rate is 10.6%.

The powerhouse Southern economy, worth a remarkable 1,435 trillion Confederate States dollars a year, is broadly diversified and led by the Arms Manufacturing industry, with major contributions from Book Publishing, Retail, and Automobile Manufacturing. Average income is 84,463 Confederate States dollars, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 3.2 times as much as the poorest.

Dog owners proudly declare that their pups can predict when the mailman will arrive, there are no more heroes any more, inheritance tax has recently been abolished, and the military is blowing up any threat to employment within the nation. Crime is almost non-existent. The Old South's national animal is the hound dog, which teeters on the brink of extinction due to widespread deforestation, and its national religion is Southern Baptist Church.

The Old South is ranked 109,608^th in the world and 16^th in Dixie for Highest Foreign Aid Spending, scoring 174.71 on the Clooney Contribution Index.